That special day is coming soon; the one that either means
so much or so little to so many! It’s that time of year when we all reflect on
our very own love stories. For some, it is sweet and others – sour. No matter
what, most people have a good love story of some type. Mine is more humorous
than romantic. That seems to be fitting for my life though. That’s why I
included this old black and white carnival photo.
I’m fortunate to say I have a love that’s lasted over 30
years now. My story starts in the early 1980’s, back before social media and
dating websites. You really had to go out of your way to have a social life
back then. Sometimes it wasn’t all that easy, depending on your finances and
ability to go places. I think many of us were paving the way for what would
become the norm. Let me explain.
My story begins in a remote part of NY, at a college where I
knew no one. I was thrown into a suite of best friends, of which I had nothing
in common with. Their last friend didn’t return to school and that left the
room available. I knew immediately I would have to figure out how to meet
like-minded people. Just meeting folks in class wasn’t enough and the bar scene
wasn’t much fun without a best friend.
I thought about things and decided to post flyers around
campus, offering my services to paint jackets for Deadheads. In case you don’t
already know, a Deadhead was a serious Grateful Dead fan. The kind that just
couldn’t go to enough concerts or hear too much of their music. That’s the only
kind that would pay to have their jean jacket painted! Plus, to be honest, I
would have to admit that I hoped I might meet a cute, available Deadhead to
travel to shows with. I actually had a “list” of dating criteria and that was
one of my “must haves.” Every woman had a list, right?
So, I created an eye-catching flyer and hoped I would meet
some cool people. Now remember, this is before Craigslist, Facebook and dating
websites. Within a day or so I had my first client. My roommate was eager to
tell me about some gorgeous guy that came looking for me while I was at class.
He left his number and we met up later. He was pretty darn handsome, but I knew
immediately we would only be friends. There was just something I couldn’t
explain. That’s how they all seemed. I was creating art, making money and
meeting people though, and that was the plan. I met females too, but none that
would become a best friend. Life was going to be different. I really had grown
up a lot over the summer.
Interestingly enough, that first gorgeous guy and I became
good friends. We spent a lot of time together and it was a few weeks later that
we shared a hug goodbye. I swear to god, there was electricity! It was a moment
frozen in time. He would tell you the same. Before that moment, I wasn’t
exactly what he was looking for in a girlfriend and we were fine with being
friends. He didn’t meet enough of my list “must haves.” He didn’t even play
guitar! That hug changed it all. Suddenly, it didn’t matter.
We went from being just friends to living together by
Christmas. I never felt so strongly about anyone in my life. I had been dating
since I was 15 and thought I had a “true love” in high school. This was
intensely different. We both found out
we were crazy in love with each other, but were opposites in so many ways that
learning to accept this as a positive would take work. Hard work! We grew up a
lot together in the past 30 years. We’ve never had things come easy, but I
think that’s what has made our love so strong. Being opposites has made us
strong as steel. He has taught me about realism and I showed him a thing or two
about the power of dreams. Here’s to hoping we have another 30 or more years to
our love story! I hope you can take the time to contemplate your special love
story – more than once a year.
